2007/03/20 20:26
Open Letters, Bathroom Edition
Dear guy peeing in the stall,
This extra level of seclusion is totally unnecessary. Yes, there are only two urinals, and a mere half-partition between them. But rest assured I'm not planning to check out your junk. And if you're worried about me catching you examining the merchandise, don't be -- for one, I'm totally secure in my masculinity, and secondly, I'm certainly not going to leave the bathroom bragging about some dude eyeing my piece.
Furthermore, if you do need more pee-pee privacy, why did you leave the door hanging open?
Just curious,
Rick
Dear guy who doesn't flush the urinal,
You're really not saving that much water, man. It's worth the pint to not advertise to the world that you had asparagus for lunch.
Thanks,
Rick
Dear guy who just got done dropping the kids off at the pool and is now giving his hands a cursory two-second rinse under cold water before drying them on his pants and leaving,
Ew.
Sincerely,
Rick
Dear Rachael Ray,
When you pee standing up, do people look at you weird?
Love,
Rick
This extra level of seclusion is totally unnecessary. Yes, there are only two urinals, and a mere half-partition between them. But rest assured I'm not planning to check out your junk. And if you're worried about me catching you examining the merchandise, don't be -- for one, I'm totally secure in my masculinity, and secondly, I'm certainly not going to leave the bathroom bragging about some dude eyeing my piece.
Furthermore, if you do need more pee-pee privacy, why did you leave the door hanging open?
Just curious,
Rick
Dear guy who doesn't flush the urinal,
You're really not saving that much water, man. It's worth the pint to not advertise to the world that you had asparagus for lunch.
Thanks,
Rick
Dear guy who just got done dropping the kids off at the pool and is now giving his hands a cursory two-second rinse under cold water before drying them on his pants and leaving,
Ew.
Sincerely,
Rick
Dear Rachael Ray,
When you pee standing up, do people look at you weird?
Love,
Rick
Labels: open letters
BWAHAHA! Potty humor! Love it.
I'm a great believer in the "courtesy flush" which a lot of people seem to never have heard of. I mentioned this as a pet peeve (that people don't do it enough) to some uptight chick and when she asked what that was and I honestly answered, she got even more uptight than usual and I don't think she's talked to me since then. It's probably her stinking up the john so I feel like puking when I walk into the restroom.
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I'm a great believer in the "courtesy flush" which a lot of people seem to never have heard of. I mentioned this as a pet peeve (that people don't do it enough) to some uptight chick and when she asked what that was and I honestly answered, she got even more uptight than usual and I don't think she's talked to me since then. It's probably her stinking up the john so I feel like puking when I walk into the restroom.
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