Have you seen that show Take Home Chef? It's on like four times a day, and if you watch cooking shows like I do you've probably happened across it by now. Basically, this smarmy Australian guy takes a fifteen-member TV crew to the supermarket and picks out some poor frumpy housefrau shopping by herself (somehow, she never spots the entire production staff of the TLC network descending upon her), upon which he attaches himself to her, leech-like, and forces her to help him cook dinner for her significant other.

The most insulting part of the show, though, is when they get back to the woman's place and he tells her to go pretty herself up while he sets up in her kitchen. Invariably, she comes back something like two hours later wearing the Outfit of Ultimate Cleavage, or some tube top that is totally unsuited to working in the kitchen. Hair is curled, glasses are gone (who needs to see?) and hemlines ride so high that if some of these chicks were in a restaurant kitchen Curtis would make them put on a bikini hairnet.

Seriously, it's like a 30-minute She's All That every episode, if instead of Rachael Leigh Cook the part of Laney had been played by Rachael Ray (right down to getting frighteningly slutty and wearing too much eyeliner). I keep waiting for the episode when they show the mark walking down the stairs to the kitchen in slow-motion while they play Sixpence None the Richer.